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SebastienMonth 2, Day 20, Saturday 8:00 p.m.One week after her day of spellcasting with Liza, Sebastien huddled outside in the biting cold of the evening, shivering her ass off for...All chapters of A Practical Guide to Sorcery will become available to everyone over time. If you would like to support me, get other bonus content like excerpts from Siobhan's Grimoire, and read this chapter right now, please support me on Patreon.
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Will I curse them if I say that all went well?
we haven’t seen them leave yet…
okay, I thought about this more, and there’s no way the heist goes this smooth. s is too unlucky for that. prediction:
alec leaves the party/dinner while everyone’s fighting (i really hope we get some idea of what goes on during ana’s side of things!) and catches s/d leaving. not sure what happens next, but that probably becomes its own little subplot.
more typos:
a gentle light shone one the -> shone on
back when she had only had one identity -> one of the ‘had’s are unneeded
I wonder how S’ relationships would’ve changed if she got caught pre-entrance test and was forced to take this offer? I can’t really imagine her being friends with Damien. It’s a tossup if she would be friends with Ana; they might eventually bond over how awful the Gervin family is, or S might absolutely despise everything related to the Gervins and further isolate herself…
typos:
held up coin -> the coin
in a shadow -> in the shadow
she picked up the ring box and put it back in the vault -> not a typo, but possible continuity error – damien hasn’t moved the ring
of her Will—which she warned Damien of first, she -> needs another dash
Yeah, things could have gone very differently at a number of points, I imagine. Possible fodder for fanfiction, if this story ever gets that popular.
Thank you for the typos, but I’m confused about the possible continuity error you mentioned.
First, Damien reached in and lifted out her mother’s ring, then set it on the floor and worked the camera.
Then Sebastien closes the window curtains, comes back, and puts the ring back in the vault (and immediately switches it out for her forgery.)
Is it unclear in the text, or are you perhaps referencing something else?
oops, just a mistake in reading comphrension. I keep thinking this line
is referring to the box/not the ring, but it is clear it’s not, and youre right, there’s no continuity error.
Oh, okay, got it. This is still useful to me, because even if there isn’t technically an error, if it’s possible for people to misunderstand, some percentage will misunderstand. (This is why my mom would hypothetically make a great beta reader, because when reading or watching fiction, she will get confused about anything and everything that could possibly cause anyone confusion, so if she can understand what’s happening, anyone can!)
I’ll make a note to clarify things during the upcoming revision pass.
Thank you!
That was exciting!
Glad you enjoyed it! (And glad you seem to have gotten access.)
🙂